Tagged with creativity

LESBIANS BROKE MY T.V. AERIAL

LESBIANS BROKE MY T.V. AERIAL

Every fact you will ever need to know about Lesbian Tornadoes – and I don’t mean aircraft piloted by gay girls. Also contains damning evidence that God hates Lancashire, along with a video of Vicars doing a catwalk show. In other words, the usual HBNW drivel. *Some facts may be twisted. Continue reading

BREAKING NEWS:  Pan Man Heralds Age of the Super Human

BREAKING NEWS: Pan Man Heralds Age of the Super Human

It’s finally happened – Pan Man has exploded into the public eye, possibly damaging the public retina in the process…   Last nights Britain’s Got Talent 2012 provided the primetime stage as pan wielding performance prat Martyn Crofts warbled ‘King of the Road’, while glottally gobbling in order to sound like a Dalek. Larynx legend Martyn, employee … Continue reading

Kerplunk: The Movie Gets the Green Light!

Kerplunk: The Movie Gets the Green Light!

Spring is here, and Hollywood FX departments are frantically putting the finishing touches to this year’s output of summer blockbusters.  Amongst this year’s crowd pleasing batch of avenging  superheroes, space jockeys and young girls kicking bottom in future dystopias comes the inevitable toy tie in movie… This year it’s the turn of the boardgame Battleship … Continue reading

The Spud-U-Like Mediocre 5000

The Spud-U-Like Mediocre 5000

  I have finally decided to fully embrace the digital age by purchasing a smart phone – the Spud-U-Like Mediocre 5000 to be precise. Previously, I’ve had to rely on typewriters and pigeons – with a nagging wife in the place of preset alarm messages and a lute instead of the latest entertainment apps.  I … Continue reading

History is a Fickle Cow

History is a Fickle Cow

  As an HB/NW, I’m constantly depressed by how much press, recognition or outright fame that other members of my family manage to achieve.  Being mundane ‘normals’ – mere consumers of entertainment – they could take or leave the valuable HB/NW commodity of publicity, so it frustrates me no end when they seem to do better … Continue reading

Britain’s Got a Pan on its Head

Britain’s Got a Pan on its Head

I think that I may have been a little disingenuous when it comes to Britain’s Got Talent and Martyn Crofts – the potentially infamous Pan Man. A few days ago I claimed that this year’s ITV talent show output – and Pan Man in particular – would herald the apocalypse.  On reflection, this line of reasoning was … Continue reading